silliness till its spent..

things to be thought, things thought today.

Everything that happens keeps pointing back to the truth I have long understood yet long shied away from. Not from fear of it, but more from awe of its enormity- its possibility- the size of the universe, the smallness of a being within it- that self same sentiment. Coming back to the center of things, the center of self, the promise of potential, that quivering horizon forever in the distance, forever sought, forever imagined and cherished. The simple power of voice, of action, of art, of language, of these hands and their small inventions, these thoughts and their continual churn, through the distractions and distance, through the walls and the wills, through the bullshit and beginnings. Through it all, till the wheels roll off, till time stands still, till the time of famine, and the days just beyond it. Through midnight breaking points and those mornings after, through dawn, through fire, through sadness and stillness. To be the world you spin your own self around, to see the world, and be in it, and be above it, and to thank it and watch and wonder at its mechanizations and manipulations and manifestations.

When the doors you open or that are opened for you lead like a maze back to the place you knew you should strive for, what else can one do but say yes (and yes, and yes again)?

Its time to ask the world for what I know I want. Taking responsibility for your desires is a big deal. It is as important as taking responsibility for your miseries, if not more so. It seems like most people are looking for an apology, a dear john letter, a way out of what they want. Are we that scared? Have we been taught so well to deny ourselves, to look for how things could be worse rather how things could be better?

I asked for the woods, and the snow, and the solitude, and I found it.

I asked for the Bay, and the mazed streets, and the ocean and the broken sky, and I found it.

I asked for a song, for this skin, for the puzzle of joy, and I found it.

I asked for something better and I found it.

Find all the small moments of glee and press them close.