Things to be thankful for, redux

Inspired by Starheadboy's post, and also a brush up on my "thank you thank you" post from a year or so ago.

Things to be thankful for:

- I am healthy, I am whole, I am here
(I am open, I am vulnerable, I am free)
(and holy shit, I'm happy)
-The exuberance/enthusiasm/excitement has not dwindled with age- in fact! It only seems to escalate with each advancing year (!yeow!)
-Train tracks to drink whiskey and walk upon, foreverfriends to walk (and, occasionally, sleep) upon them with.
- the last vestiges of the veneer of "cool" being stripped away and shed
- Being able to make good decisions ("immakingagooddecision!!!") for myself, and having them be supported and applauded by the people I care about.
- The people I care about being able to make good decisions.
- The people I care about finding solace, happiness, comfort, the inane, the majestic, the miracles, the magic, forever and always.
-Relationships with family/friends/lovers that evolve and expand, that improve and grow closer, that hum with honest and healthy communication and mutual aide, versus silence, stagnancy, gossip, and self interest. People wanting to be closer! People wanting to be healthy! I am still amazed by this. Its awesometown!
-My family, my family, my family- and their enduring support, stability, and sense of humor.
-The family we've created- the simple reality of having a core of friends that you can actually trust and rely upon, that you can plan a future with, that you can make promises to, and keep them (dare I say it.. the beginnings of a .. gasp! community!!??)
-Filthy, filthy, filthy smut talking, making obscene jokes and gestures, inappropriate dancing in public. Being lewd and crude and disgusting without hurting anyone.
-Ingenuity and imagination- and the flood of projects/ plans I'm working on or plotting out for the future.
-The fact that all the weird/nonsensical/bizarre/absurd/un reality/gibber/jabber joke making and story telling is understood and appreciated by at least some percentage of good people in this world.
-Being able to feel well cared for.

As we travel and traverse...

Everything is spinning and conspiring together, all in service of my own delight and eternal amusement. Is it possible to quantify happiness? I would only feel more if we were here, together, in one time, one place.

silliness till its spent..

things to be thought, things thought today.

Everything that happens keeps pointing back to the truth I have long understood yet long shied away from. Not from fear of it, but more from awe of its enormity- its possibility- the size of the universe, the smallness of a being within it- that self same sentiment. Coming back to the center of things, the center of self, the promise of potential, that quivering horizon forever in the distance, forever sought, forever imagined and cherished. The simple power of voice, of action, of art, of language, of these hands and their small inventions, these thoughts and their continual churn, through the distractions and distance, through the walls and the wills, through the bullshit and beginnings. Through it all, till the wheels roll off, till time stands still, till the time of famine, and the days just beyond it. Through midnight breaking points and those mornings after, through dawn, through fire, through sadness and stillness. To be the world you spin your own self around, to see the world, and be in it, and be above it, and to thank it and watch and wonder at its mechanizations and manipulations and manifestations.

When the doors you open or that are opened for you lead like a maze back to the place you knew you should strive for, what else can one do but say yes (and yes, and yes again)?

Its time to ask the world for what I know I want. Taking responsibility for your desires is a big deal. It is as important as taking responsibility for your miseries, if not more so. It seems like most people are looking for an apology, a dear john letter, a way out of what they want. Are we that scared? Have we been taught so well to deny ourselves, to look for how things could be worse rather how things could be better?

I asked for the woods, and the snow, and the solitude, and I found it.

I asked for the Bay, and the mazed streets, and the ocean and the broken sky, and I found it.

I asked for a song, for this skin, for the puzzle of joy, and I found it.

I asked for something better and I found it.

Find all the small moments of glee and press them close.